I am SOOO over being sick. This is ridiculous. It is taking everything out of me. I’ve literally been in bed, fast asleep, by 9:30pm..haha. I usually have really bad insomnia, so you know this is serious business..haha. I know what you all are thinking, uhh.. go to the doctor? I know, I know. I just keep convincing myself that it will go away on its own, and why waste $30? $30 could be some groceries, or household products that we need, or who knows, but why waste it? I’m so cheap, I guess. Cheap, or poor? Both. Anyways, any time I think of going to the doctor, I get better. Then the next day, new symptoms appear. The past two days, it’s been HORRIBLE coughing..to the point where it’s painful..ugh. And exhaustion. Gross.

Sorry, that was completely random. Blame Tylenol cold, heh. Sunday was Rob’s birthday, and I can honestly say that I spent the ENTIRE day in the kitchen. It started out with dishes..you see, we’ve been having a standoff. I was sick of doing EVERYTHING, and Rob promised to do the dishes, so I left them. and left them. and left them. Literally, almost every dish we had was in the sink, he kept promising to do them. Guess who got stuck with them? yeah, me. We had people coming over, I couldn’t just leave them there!! So it was dishes, then I made him a BIG ole breakfast. Homemade banana waffles (which were AMAZING!), bisquits and gravy, sausage, and omelets. It was delicious, only problem? There were only 2 of us and we made waaaay too much. I still have bisquits in my fridge. Then it was more dishes, then on to the pumpkin pies, more dishes, on to the chocolate birthday cake. More dishes. ugh.. I never want to see dishes again! We went to Olive Garden for dinner, and then back home. This is all while I am STILL sick. I was literally in bed and fast asleep by 9:30. What the??

… and how was YOUR weekend?? haha.

It seems like EVERYWHERE anyone looks, there are loads of pregnant women. I mean, they are literally everywhere. My mom seems to think it’s because there are more people my age, that I know, that are becoming pregnant. That’s why I notice it more. Who knows.

All I know is that it makes things so much harder for me. With this stupid PCOS, I worry that I will never have babies. There are so many things you can do and try, but I know it’s going to be a long hard road. We’ve been “not-trying” (ie: not saying we’re trying, but not trying to prevent anything) for awhile, with no “accidents”. There were a couple times I thought that FOR SURE I was pregnant, had every symptom there was. Rob even noticed these symptoms before I said anything, yet low and behold, no positive test. I’ve only touched the tip of the iceberg and even though I want babies more than anything, it’s hard to think about trying. About actually saying that we’re “trying”. Because then we have to face the fact that there is a problem, we can’t blame it on the fact that we haven’t been “trying”, so no big deal. I think having the face that fact is the hardest thing to do.

I just become so envious when I see this blog or that blog, or hear this person or that, talk about their babies. About the preggo belly, about the symptoms, about how great it is to be a mommy. I can’t wait for all of that. I will be one of those weirdos that enjoy morning sickness, that enjoy backaches, and all of the weird stuff that happens when you’re pregnant. haha. I’m going to be the person talking to my belly, and putting headphones around it so baby can hear some nice music..haha. But when will it be my turn? I know that when it’s meant to be, it will be..but it’s hard to sit back and wait for it to be meant to be.

Everyone keeps saying that it must be something in the water, that’s why everyone in the world is pregnant. All I can do, I guess is continue to drink the water and hope for the best.